May 18th, 2010
JEFBOT.240_Cookie Monster
While I was happily surprised at how many of you hated soggy cereal as much as jefbot in the previous strip, I don’t expect as many of you to be in agreement when it comes to the practice of cookie dunking. I have so many friends who love to dunk their cookies in milk that I’m pretty sure I’ll be outvoted on this one. Still, I maintain that soggy food is gross, even when it pertains to something as delicious as cookies.
Dunking cookies = delicious.
Dunking /warm/ cookies = extra delicious.
Oreos =/= delicious.
i definitely crave milk while i’m eating cookies, MM, but just can’t get myself to dunk ‘em, no matter how delicious it may be.
i’m with you, bot. partly because i’m lactose intolerant for real, but mostly because soggy cookies – or anything else – is nasty.
i stand on the side of soggy cookies!
just stinks when i leave it in the milk to long and it breaks off and floats to the bottom.
and then what do you do with that sunken, soggy cookie, t_d? do you drink the contaminated milk to get to it? do you get it out with a fork? blegh!
There is an art to it. Only those of us who are well-trained in the practice (such as myself) can manage dipping without chunks breaking off via a finely honed intuitive knowledge of when the cookie will be just right.
That said, many Australians have a more unique solution: the Tim Tam slam.
fork? fork! we don’t need no stinking fork!
just turn the glass up and do it like a shot!
Cookies are delicious however you eat them.
Oh, and I like Cookies with milk, not in it.
good way to put it, Maryz: with milk not in it.
I am not a fan of crispy cookies, unless they’re oreos. (And in that case, I dunk them in milk, just to soak up a little bit of milk.) I am a bit of a spoiled one when it comes down to my chocolate chip cookies, which in my opinion, are meant to be soft.
I love how you captured CF’s innocent cookie eating side. (As we all seem to think back on our childhood, and how much we loved to eat cookies with milk.) That last line you delivered had me giggling. This was another great one! Very cute.
i like my cookies a bit crunchy on the outside and a bit soft on the inside, Spanky, and chocolate chip cookies rank near the top of my favorites!
and i was trying to make the Cornfather appear as innocent as possible until the reveal, so glad you liked that side of him in those first four panels!
LMAO, innocent my ass! All things cutesy like that are made of PURE evil!
I prefer my cookies sans dunking, athankyouverymuch.
see? again we think alike, Kev.
Eating Cookies while drinking milk… yuck… Also doesn’t help that I dislike milk quite badly. Cookies w/o dunkin’ ftw!
woo! in complete agreement with your last statement, Chibby.
You managed to make the Cornfather look like he’s about 3 yrs old while eating his cookies. So CUTE! And JefBot looks like he is one dunk from a red face and smoke rising from his head.
I am not much of a fan of dunking cookies in milk (or even coffee). I’m meh on the cookies themselves after they have been dunked, but I CANNOT STAND to have chunks of stuff in my milk/coffee when I drink it (*gag*) so I generally am not a dunker.
thanks, shanna! who knew the Cornfather could look so adorable while being so conniving?
and: sweet! another vote against dunking.
I eat oreos like a kid when I feel up for it. I like the center and dunk the cookie. Yuuuuuummmm.
Sometimes there ain’t cold milk at hand, though, and I just eat them as is.
…..I want some oreos, now.
my roommate bought a ton of Oreos recently, Jaeh, so i’ve been trying (unsuccessfully) to stay away from them. i used to separate the cookie halves and lick the frosting off but now i like it all at the same time so i leave the Oreo intact.
talking about Oreos has now made me want some, too. guess what i’ll be doing when i get home?
Where are you when you reply to these comments if not at home?
yesterday i was replying to comments during a break at work.
well, my oreo craving didn’t get satisfied, there weren’t any back home. I’d just have to satisfy myself with staring at cornfather as he eats. xD
cookie duking is illogical
they fall apart
agreed, andrew D.
No mushy food for me – not cereal, and certainly not cookies. I enjoy a soft baked cooke that’s chewy, but never soggy. And crumby drinks are crumby. No thanks.
Others can do as they wish. I stand firmly on the no dunking side of this question.
another “no dunking” vote! woo!
and i like soft baked cookies too, Murrday. as long as they’re baked, i’m cool with ‘em – but uncooked cookie dough!? blegh.
Yuck I agree! Eating cookie dough is just nasty. I’ve seen people grab those pilsbury cookie dough logs and eat them right out of it while IN THE STORE! *shiver* So gross.
“IN THE STORE”!? the horror… the horror.
I have to agree, so gross! Gives me shivers thinking about it, of course I also loath milk. *yuck*
i’ll take that as another check mark for the “no dunking” side. thanks, Lily!
Try dunking oreos in cold cold cold cranberry juice..it sounds gross but the tart and the sweet compliment each other quite nicely!
i know i’ll hate it ‘cuz there will still be the soggy-factor, Pearl, but i gotta admit: you’ve got me intrigued enough to try it. know that if this is some kind of cruel joke though, that i will hunt you down and force feed you soggy Oreos ’til you burst.
You must hate the very concept of biscotti.
While I have to agree that I’d rather have my cookies WITH milk, not IN it, the Biscotti seems to be custom made for dunking — unlike cookies, it’s slender profile will fit into the mouth of almost any glass or cup. That said, I typically find myself taking a bite of Biscotti, and then a swig of my coffee, same as I do with cookies. What can I say? I’m a creature of habit.
I’m somewhat impressed that you can gnaw through it (let alone with any enjoyment). I think biscotti IS custom-made for dunking. I can’t imagine why anyone would put up with how hard it is otherwise.
i’m with Stan here: if i have biscotti with coffee, i’ll gnaw, then sip, but never dunk.
pretty much, Sharra. although i have been known to eat biscotti sans coffee. especially if its glazed with a little chocolate.
Love cookies, hate milk, haven’t had cereal in decades because it involes milk. Blech. The only way to make milk palatable is to transform it into ice cream.
LOL! I totally agree!
ha! i used to HATE milk, Estiveo. the only way i could stand it was when Quik (chocolate or strawberry) was mixed into it. (and yes, when it was transformed into delicious ice cream.) nowadays, i like milk, just not when it makes things mushy.
cookie dunking is gross!!! it makes the cookies all squishy and dulls the sugary taste, and then the milk gets crumbs in it…. It’s just wrong.
exactly, cynthia! whoever invented cookie dunking should be fired.
Yeah…I’m all for soft cookies. Hard crispy cookies SUCK! When I bake, they are always soft. Cookies and milk are the best, they make me sleepy and relaxed. Comfort food in all it’s glory.
But in general…yes I do not like mushy food. I am all about the texture. I won’t eat grits or oatmeal…Gritty like wet sand and mushy…respectivly.
soft cookies are good, but i like crispy cookies also – as long as i’m not gonna chip a tooth on ‘em or anything, Pixie. warm out of the oven is heavenly.
i’ll eat oatmeal, but it has to have minimal water (or milk) in it. it’s gotta be like a thick, chewy paste for me to eat it.
You need to live in FL so I can make you cookies! And fatten you up!
So Cute!! Now the Cornfather has made me hungry for Oreo’s!!!
if you’re in the neighborhood in the next week or so, stop by and i’ll give you a stack of ‘em, JP.
Oh God!!! There is NOTHING worse than a loud, open mouthed eater!!! It’s one of my biggest pet peeves… But this strip- So cute!! Nice job Jefbot, very fun!
FS, Jefbot isn’t upset about The Cornfather’s loud chewing. He’s more upset with the fact that CF is dunking cookies in milk. I quote the bot himself,
“While I was happily surprised at how many of you hated soggy cereal as much as jefbot in the previous strip, I don’t expect as many of you to be in agreement when it comes to the practice of cookie dunking. I have so many friends who love to dunk their cookies in milk that I’m pretty sure I’ll be outvoted on this one. Still, I maintain that soggy food is gross, even when it pertains to something as delicious as cookies.” – from Jefbot
Again with the voting remarks. Why dont we seriously get a poll on the site for controversies in the strips?
And by WE I mean Jfbot. I just loooooove overburdenning good talented people with more work.
*Insert Sonitans Evil laugh of Doom here.*
heh. not a bad idea, Maryz. if i have time to get a poll up tonight before i start on tomorrow’s strip, i’ll do it.
loud, mouth-chewing is one of the Cornfather’s hang ups, Funnyshaffer! i might have to cover that in a future strip.
HAHAHAHAHA…Jeff and his hang-ups = Great storylines
thanks, Jeff! glad you find these hang-ups entertaining.
I’ve had cookies with milk once, last year. I made the horrible mistake of dunking it in the milk first, as was suggested. Then, it turns out it also had white chocolate, which I am allergic to, as well as milk chocolate. Needless to say, I no longer regret not having the combination as a child.
wow. that’s the most horrifying cookie-dunking disaster story i’ve ever heard, Twigus_Maximus! and just adds more fuel to the fire of why i’m against dunking: PEOPLE COULD DIE.
Haha. My boyfriend can’t stand the noises people make when they eat.
And the dunk and eat method for cookies works best with Windmill Cookies and Graham crakers.
while i refuse to “dunk and eat” any cookies in milk or tea, DJ, did i tell you i just picked up some new Oreos? like, How to Train Your Dragon Oreos with red stuffing!? they’re awesome.
You’re sh!tting me red filling…. Must find these oreos.
dude love reading you webcomic ^_^ it’s like totally awesome, honestly i kinda prefer your webcomic over VGcats.
VGcats ain’t got nothing on you.
although i do like Leo from it but thats about it.
VGcats updates like once a month if your lucky, thats why
that’s a shame.
thanks for such a huge compliment, Hikari! VG Cats was one of the strips that introduced me to the world of webcomics, and i’m honored to be put in such good company.
I do exactly what The Cornfather is doing. Dip, munch, sip.
okay, so that’s another vote for dunking, Shion. i still think the “no dunks” have it, though!
Wow, bot. You’re coming clean about this one. I consider your dislike of dunking cookies into milk a DEEP, DARK, and TERRIBLE secret. I can’t believe you’re laying it all out there for the entire world…wide web to see. At least it looks really good.
Congratulations on yet another amazing, fun, colorful, expressive, and all around genius strip, Mr. Bot! 
i couldn’t take it any longer, MC – i had to let everyone know about my hatred for dunking! it was eating away at me! feels so good to get it off my chest.
But if the world didn’t dunk cookies then what would Italians do with their Vin Santo?
(True connoisseurs dunk their biscotti in Vin Santo. I learned this in wine class. HURRAY PRETENTION!)
JB, you have lost your friggin mind. I am not sure we can even be friends anymore. I am still disgusted you dont drink your milk…and now you are hating on cookie dunking. I can’t believe you man. Though I am with CF, another great looking strip. I love the way you used your perception of gross to put the floating bits in it and change the color of the milk to a murky bleh in the last couple of panels.
blegh! you’re a dunker, Slave1!? you’re right: i don’t think we can be friends anymore.
glad you liked the floaty bits in the milk, but they should’ve grossed you out more and discouraged you from dunking ever again.
Poor Cookies. To abuse them so. WHY! WHY must it be this way?!?!?! Milk… that most horrible of substances…. to defile a cookie with such as its ilk… BLASPHEMY!
And yes… I realize the irony of a kitten type person despising milk.
I gotta love that sentiment, also i just read through all of Scooter Kitten and absolutely loved it, hope you get back to it soon.
Meep! O.O! Thanks. :blush:
looks like there’s a bunch of readers like yourself, Tanya, that just don’t like milk. i was going to count that as a vote for “no dunking” but i think i’ll have to invent a third category to be fair.
PS: i checked out Scooter Kitten and, like Deaconvorbis here, totally dug it. but with a name like that, you should really like milk. irony, indeed.
Love this strip man, i’m with you, dunking = bad. Although i don’t eat much sweet stuff these days, bad teeth and an over developed love of savory snacks has all but cured the sweet tooth. And i guess i’m just too old for oreos, we didn’t get them over here when i was a kid. Give me a nice big pack of raw peanuts and a large beer or six and i’m happy.
thanks, dude! i’ve been trying to curb my eating of sweet stuff lately, but without much luck. especially with this open box of Oreos at my apartment and a soda/candy shop that opened recently near the office where i work. cadbury flake and dublin dr. pepper FTW!
of course, a pack of peanuts and beer sounds good, too.
No milk, just eat all the cookies.
wow! another vote for no milk, period!
while i still might sneak a sip of milk, i’ll have no problems eating all the cookies, Rinthia.
I’m a dunker!
say it isn’t so, Alana! :O
I dunk when I can to soften those annoying hard cookies, but if it’s soft, I won’t bother.
so you’re a part-time dunker, NeoDarklight? hmm… i suppose i’ll still have to put you in the “dunk” category.
Oreos while probably the only cookie I drunk, are at their best when soggy.
but that makes them GROSS, Hornet!
Is it even possible to get an Oreo soggy? If so, I don’t have that kind of patience.
My poison is peanut-butter between two full size graham crackers. Timing is very tricky with that, it soaks up a lot of milk in a hurry and if you aren’t careful it WILL drop off. Mmmm soggilicious, you’d hate it.
man, all that stuff sounds awesome, Skeptible: peanut-butter = good; graham crackers = good; milk = good. but then to dunk all that goodness into a glass of milk!? you’re assessment is correct: i’d hate it.
another dunk vote. i think your team is catching up!
Yes, you can even get them to drop off.
However it does take a while.
Mmmmm. cookies.
i like oreos so much i named my first cat “oreo”. course, his black and white fur kinda meant that there was really no other suitable name for him. : )
so do you dunk “oreo” in milk or leave him dry, Cogwell? i need to tally these votes!
I hate dunking cookies. Well I don’t like cookies that much anyway
i’m still counting that as a vote for the “no dunks,” IDTMRB!
huh…never thought of using cookies as a way of torture….interesting (insert evil grin)
leave it to the Cornfather to torment bot with cookies, Anonymous. he looks like a nice guy, but he’s not.
Hmm, now I wonder what would happen if I dunk Oreos in strawberry milk? Sure to taste interesting, even WITHOUT the dunking.
ya know – i might just have to try this, Neo, without the dunking, of course. now i just need to get some strawberry Quik…
i enjoy cookies dunked in milk but i refuse to drink the milk after i have done so.
well at least that’s something, Celystia. it appears you haven’t gone to the dark side completely.
Surprisingly, there are a lot of people that don’t dunk. I know there are lots of people doing it, but I neither want to do it nor watch it. Thanks Jefbot for bringing this to light. I don’t think Dunkers realize how disgusting it really is.
first time I see transparent milk… if ya didn’t write it was milk I would have been sure he was dunking his oreo in water… that would have been weird… especially drinking the water after the dunking… bleh…
I admit, I’m one of the rascally Oreo dunkers. On occasion, Chocolate Chipp cookies, but really only Oreos as a matter of preference. The rest of the time, I agree- milk’s a better chaser than flavoring.
Cereal, now, I’m 50/50, depending on the cereal and my mood.
However, you HAVE to admit, the gery/brown/purple milk that Fruity Pebbles leaves behind is something only Leprechauns could’ve made… ^_^
HAHA cookie monster ftw!
apparently he’s not allowed to eat just cookies anymore…. ‘coz the government said so…
great job once again
The absolute BEST way to eat oreos:
Put 10 or so in a glass.
Fill the glass with milk.
Grab a large spoon, and eat it like cereal.
By the end, there’s just a big cookie/milk mush…not only is it delicious, but it gives you superpowers. No, REALLY!
I’m a part-time dunker — only with hard cookies like Oreos! I have to get ‘em soggy ’cause my teeth can’t bite into hard foods like that. I’d rather have my Oreos soggy than not have them at all!
Okay, soggy cereal.. BLEAHCHHHHHH
Soggy cookies – BLEAARRRRCCGHHHHH
there is an art to cookie dunking where the cookie is inundated with milk , only to the point the surface of the cookie maintains 40 percent of its surface density. Most people choose to duck the cookie far too long and risk complete disintegration of the cookie, and ruining the perfect viscosity of the milk by introducing cookie debris in excess of a ratio, that would lead to cookie sediment at the bottom of the glass. Suffice it to say that is like pouring that powdery cereal dust into a Marvelously cold Bowl of Milk and calling it delightful, Such is the act of The Insane , and Culinary Criminal sociopath.
No Excuse me , I must get a Glass of Milk and some Vanilla Wafers….
there is so many downsides to cookie n milk first you need like 2 pints of milk for your cookies!! and you cnt dunk ur cookies or your milk will hve yucky bits in it! and you always run out of milk before you fun out of cookie!!
OH the hardships of cookies n milk!!
and i see the cornfather didnt do the whole lick the white but then dunk like the tv ad!!! wooo
I dunk my poptarts
My dad does the cookie dunking and my weird little sister does it with hot fries, cheetos, and those onion flavored chips. Only the hot ones. I don’t like this food dunking thing. It makes me queezy.
Have you ever tried graham crackers with apple juice?
It’s freaking delicious!
And please, do not mock the dunking practice.
OTHERWISE YOU WOULD NOT HAVE TIRAMISU OR BISCOTTI OR DARE I SAY FRENCH TOAST (aka pain perdu.)
Cause seriously. Tiramisu? Invented by Italian housewives to get rid of leftover coffee.