December 2nd, 2008
JEFBOT.99_Burpless
It’s true: I can’t burp. I’ve been acutely aware of this deficiency ever since I was a kid, watching my friends down Cokes while letting off huge, belching thunderclaps. Everyone else in my family can burp, which my sisters have made painfully obvious at almost every family dinner, yet my throat has been silenced, for reasons unknown.
Is anyone else out there burpless? Have any of you been burpless and overcome it? How fun is burping? I demand answers!!!
–
Yes, it’s also true that rats can’t burp. Find out why by clicking here.
i need all the help i can get, Mr Mojo, so i’m down for the training course whenever you are.
Now that I think about it, burping is kind of weird. Or maybe I am. Anyway, it’s like something in your stomach triggers the whole process, like carbonation or swallowing air as you eat. If there’s too much air and you burp, it does feel better. It’s the release of pressure. Although you can burp stuff up too. Not fun. My grandmother, tiny as she is, can give some impressives belches. She probably wishes she could be burpless. And here’s a fun fact: Chickens can burp either!
ha! i’d love to see your grandmother burp. you should definitely videotape that and put it on youtube, Rahnee! and i didn’t know that about chickens. cue music and animation again for: “the more you know!”
r u saying my little bro is a chicken???
No!!
no worries, Rahnee, i appreciated the trivia! xinda’s just very protective of the family.
I can burb… involuntarily only, not on command. But I can’t whistle at all!
Ack, where’s the stupid edit key? That was supposed to be burp.
Can I blame the fact that I just got off a 10 hr shift teaching people how to do things like copy & paste, or use a mouse? Yeah… gotta love tech support…
i can only whistle sucking air in, Shay! also: i work full time developing training programs, so i completely understand how your brain can go to mush when sitting in front of a computer doing that stuff for hours on end. it’s why i have JEFbot – the writing and drawing recharges me. hope you have an outlet, too.
i, too, can only whistle while inhaling
Burping is fan-freakin’-tastic! Especially when you’ve got heartburn and you’ve just swallowed a gallon of water & baking soda solution (okay, maybe not a whole gallon…)
if i swallowed a gallon of a water and baking soda solution, i would literally burst into a million pieces, BenPanced. actually, first, i’d finally let out the world’s largest burp ever, be happy, then explode.
ok don’t think i can solve the mystery of the missing burp but this has to the the record for comments on one strip
seriously, alex! i didn’t realize the topic of burplessness would strike such a chord!
i learn so much about you from your drawings. just like a psychologist.
the JEFbot strips are the little rorschach blots of my soul, g.
Wow! I thought I was the only one! My husband doesn’t believe me.
And I was born in the Year of the Rat too! Weird.
you’re a rat, too, Julie? maybe i’m onto something here. alert the New England Journal of Medicine! hope you forced your husband to read this strip and then pointed at the monitor and shouted, “see!? SEE!!!???”
[...] did, I don’t want to know, even if it means unlocking the secrets of why I can’t burp. Click here to start at the beginning of the “Burpless” [...]
burping is the ultimate pleasure in the universe. thats why most people hate you burping.
“the ultimate pleasure in the universe”!!!??? why do you tease me so, JefbotFan@#300!?
I remember those burps….too bad they were my cousin Amber’s burps. I could never quite keep up with her
from all the feedback i’ve been getting from this storyline (not to mention having two sisters and girlfriends), i’ve come to the conclusion that the ladies are just as good at burping (if not more so!) than the dudes.
I’ve never been able to burp, but I can kinda gurgle if I constrict my chest muscles or take a really deep breath. At night when I try to sleep little gurgles work themselves up every 3 breaths or so, it’s very irritating. Mostly I just keep the mylanta handy. I find the antacid plus anti-gas ones work the best.
One of my ex-boyfriends (formerly known as The Ex) doesn’t burp. Not sure if he CAN’T or just doesn’t. I’m sure that since he cannot burp he just farts an abnormal amount.
I take great pride in the fact that I can now burp on command… although when I do, it takes a while for me to be able to stop.
DID HE BREAK THE DAMN SOUND BARRIER!
You cannot belch. You, however, may need practice burping.
Burps are to regurgitation as belches are to vomiting.
Drink some soda, then practice by relaxing your chest while laying on your back.
Patience, young padawan. You cannot force the force.
My sister can’t burp either. Never has. She’s chinese; maybe it’s an asian thing?? (But she was born under the dragon) I’m sorry you can’t! Burping is a delightful outlet for me. I’ve been gifted the ability to burp on command as well as like a sailor when drinking soda or something. I hope you develop this ability soon or find an equal oulet.
[...] And, in case you missed it, jefbot’s inability to burp was well documented in the mini-storyline that started here: JEFBOT.99_Burpless [...]
i was born in the year of the rat and i can burp all the time
you just dont concentrate on burping(if it needs to come it will
I on command. It appears I stole your burps. If you were born in ’84, that is… If you were born in ’72, I can’t be held responsible.
I on command… that sounds like the new “I accidentally the whole …” meme. Anyway. What I meant to say was that I can burp on command.
I used to think I was alone in that! Until I was 17, I too was incapable of burping. Instead, I’d get this weird block in my throat, almost like a big air bubble stuck in there that made it hard to swallow. It’d stick around for a couple hours, or even days, and then disappear. But somehow, after I turned 17, I just… magically gained the ability to burp. I couldn’t tell you how it happened, but I wish I knew.
Anyway, if this problem ever miraculously clears up for you, you will then always have an excuse for letting out huge, disgustingly loud burps in public: “I couldn’t burp for YEARS! Do you have any idea how much catching up I have to do?!”
Oh, and for the record, I am neither a rat baby nor Asian.
hehehe, I can’t burp either! It’s a good thing tho, it means that you’re better at swallowing then most people; you’re not taking in a lot of air when you bring down food. It could also be attributed to a thin throat passage. Either way, not a bad thing.
I’m a girl….I LOOOOOVE burping cause its just….cathartic, I suppose? anyways…when I was in 8th grade- my friends (mostly guys) and I would have burping contests, and I’d always win *_*
have you tried chugging club soda all at once while swallowing air? it works for most people ^^
YOU TOO!?!
Finally *sniff* I’m not alone. I’ve never been able to burp and always get so damn bloated if I drink soda.
I too cannot burp
I was born in teh year of the Rat, and I can burp! I can’t vomit though, (even though I’ve tried) without being violently sick, so maybe there’s something about us Rats
My dad mind you, can burp on demand. *jealous*
Like your grandmother, I’m small, and my b/f is quite impressed (or maybe just blown away?) with the burps I can let go *proud*
Burping is a wonderful sensation and I’m sorry you can’t experience it. When you do it feels like your stomach shrinks to half its size because of all the released pressure. Doesn’t always taste good tough. I wonder if people born in the year of the Cock have burping difficulties as well? I don’t think birds can burp…
When my sister had surgery for acid reflux disease she lost her ability to burp and vomit as a side effect. Then she got Norwalk! She eventually did vomit but she tore something in her esophagus when she did so. They were able to fix it though, and now she has her “abilities” back.
So maybe if you got violently ill you would like stretch out your esophagus or something and then be able to burp. lol
BTW been reading your archives and really liking everything so far.
Haha! I’m reading your comics for the first time now, and this made me laugh until I cried. I thought I was the only person who can’t burp! If you do see this comment, have you learned how to burp since this was published? I think I can’t burp because it feels like the same mechanism as vomiting to me, and I’ll do anything in my power to not vomit.
I can’t really burp/belch. If I have excess gas pressure in my stomach, it slowly leaks up my throat, making strange growling noises on the way. Once this starts, it usually goes on for quite a while. I can do it “on command” if I open my mouth and tense my stomach muscles, but I just can’t summon a proper burp.